It can be hard. Really really hard. Most days are fine. You can cope with your childless void, and exist in every day life with a smile and truly be happy for your friends and family with children. With pregnancy announcements and baby showers. Most days I'm happy for them. Excited with them even. BUT then there are the days I miss my period. I'll go months being completely regular and then out of no where I miss. For no reason. I wait a week after i miss my period to take a pregnancy test, just to be safe to make sure af doesn't show her ugly stupid face. I imagine myself telling jared we are pregnant, us telling our parents, doing a gender reveal, having a baby shower, ultrasounds, heck I even picture myself with a big ole pregnant belly. But the catch? Test is always negative. I'm never pregnant, even when i miss. Never. It's just a sick game my body plays with my head that ends with me being dissappinted, upset, and angry every time it happ